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Impact Write-up (July 8th, 2010): What’s Worse? Daffney Reduced To Jobber or Madison Dissing Someone’s Weave?

Last week on Impact, Knockouts Champ, Madison Rayne, faced off against Taylor Wilde in a match that was overshadowed by several superficial things and a very memorable backstage brawl. Angelina Love would end up getting involved and you had the makings of a really decent Impact. This week, the shoe was on the other foot as Angelina got into the ring. She took on Diva Dirt favorite, Daffney, in a lopsided match and stipulations were placed on this Sunday’s championship match. Post-match promo hilarity ensued and there was no follow-up to the Saritaylor falling out. Oh well.

To kick off our Impact coverage tonight, everyone’s favorite goth queen, Daffney, is in the ring and she’s set to take on Angelina Love, the number one contender to the Knockouts Championship. It’s nice to see the crowd react so warmly towards Daffney, and Angelina’s reaction is just as nice. After Angelina completes the posing portion of her ring entrance, the two femme fatales begin to stare one another down from opposing ends of the ring. As soon as the bell rings, both Knockouts lock-up and Angelina immediately takes control by working over Daffney’s wrist. Zombie Hot is able to turn that in her favor in almost no time but Angelina no sells the armbar and slams her knee into the gut of her opponent. Daffney doubles over in pain, but she doesn’t release the hold, so Angelina does it again. This jars Daffney’s grip and Angelina is able to whip Daffney into the ropes and take her down with a clothesline.

Daff bounces back to her feet, but Angelina just knocks her down for a second time. This time, Angelina pulls Daffney up and locks her in a side headlock. Daffney attempts to fight out of this with a few elbow shots to Angelina’s stomach, and she gets sent to the ropes. She comes flying at Angelina but the crafty, blonde Canadian sends the Scream Queen down once again with a flying spinning heel kick. Daffney is very slow to get to her feet, but when she does, she manages to send Angelina across the ring and towards one of the opposite turnbuckles. She charges forward, but Angelina is waiting on her and catches Daffney with an elbow. This sends Daffney reeling and Angelina once again pounces with a pretty standard headlock.

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Impact Write-Up (July 1st, 2010): ECW Originals, Weaves, And Bad Fashion Distract From What May Have Been A Good Match

Before I even get started, I want to give a big, Southern Belle thanks to Jennifer who graciously stepped in for me last week and forced herself to write about Impact.  I know that at times it can be depressing and rather unfortunate, but Jennifer was able to preserver and shed a beautiful, shining light on something I found repetitive and downright excruciating. She has inspired me to look at TNA this week with an open mind and a glass half-full approach, so Jennifer thank you for that. I will definitely be thinking of sunshine, rainbows, naughty time with my husband, Justin, and lots of ice cream.

Wow, did I really just use “Justin” and “rainbow” in the same sentence? Damn you all.

Ahem! Moving on to more important things tonight’s action. TNA Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne, took on former champion and TNA Tag Team Champion, Taylor Wilde. Number one contender, Angelina Love, made her presence felt and in addition to the match, we got a fun backstage brawl involving Sarita, and a Chelsea appearance. Lots to talk about for a change.

Taylor Wilde is the first competitor in the ring. They make sure we know she’s a former Knockouts Champion and her outfit just leaves me scratching my head. Taylor, between you and I, that is not a flattering look for you! The champ, Miss Madison, is out next and she’s looking mighty lovely. Yeah, who am I kidding? Madison looks downright awful with her new hairdo. That’s a crying shame because she was so pretty before. Blah. Her outfit is great though. As Madison’s entrance takes place, the commentators run down Angelina’s dominance over Lacey and Velvet the previous two weeks, and finally it’s time for the match to get started. The girls lock up and Taylor takes Madison down early. She rolls over her, attempts a headlock, but Madison wiggles free and brings both back to their feet. She jerks Taylor’s head back by the hair and starts screaming in her face and waving her finger. Sheesh Madison. The referee slaps Madison on the arm to get her to stop and that understandably pisses off Madison because you’re not supposed to hit a woman. Madison whirls around to question his actions which allows Taylor to get back in the swing of things. She turns Madison around and slams her in the jaw with a convincing punch. Madison staggers but regains her balance and goes for a spear. Taylor ends up down on the mat and that gives Madison a chance to mount her and start punishing her.

The feisty little Knockout begins to slam Taylor’s head into the mat over and over, until the referee starts to bitch again. Madison unleashes her verbal fury on him but nonetheless, she gets up and drags Taylor over to the ropes. Taylor finds herself in a world of hurt as Madison starts choking her and pulling on her face. Madison backs off and sends Taylor to the opposite side of the ring. The blonde Canadian ends up using her momentum to reverse Madison’s offense and bring her down with a lazy looking hurricanrana. She attempts another fancy move, but Madison somersaults out of it. In the end, Taylor maintains her control and Madison ends up on the receiving end of another shot to the face. Taylor motions for Madison to get up and when she does, she pushes her against the ropes and chops her across the chest. Taylor goes to throw Madison across the ring, but the savvy BP member hangs tough and jerks Taylor down by the hair. Madison turns her back and Taylor takes the opportunity to run towards the top rope and spring onto it.

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Impact Write-Up (June 24th, 2010): Bowling for Beautiful People

Please Note: Due to problems with her computer, Cryssi will be away for a few weeks. In the meantime, please welcome Diva Dirt reader JenniferL134 who will be filling in.

Last week, Angelina Love declared her mission: to demolish The Beautiful People and regain “her” Knockouts Title at Victory Road. She said she would take out TBP one person at a time. She did so, starting with Lacey Von Erich, planting her head into a steel chair at the end of last week’s match. It may have gotten Love disqualified, but she couldn’t have cared less. The camera caught her saying, “One down… two to go.” The next person to feel her wrath is her former BFF, Velvet Sky. Will Vel-Vel come out victorious or will the Love Express roll over her? Watch below…


Skip to 04:40

We catch Madison Rayne and Velvet Sky in a restroom, Madison primping her hair (which has some prominent black streaks in it, like Velvet’s) in the mirror while we see Vel in the background, head down, very somber look on her face. (A public restroom? For shame ladies! I would’ve thought TBP had their own private, sparkling bathroom. I am aghast!) Madison talks about Lacey being in the hospital: “At least she’s used to lying on her back!” She laughs but notices Velvet didn’t respond. She turns and puts a hand on Vel’s face, forcing it upwards, asking if she was paying attention since she made “a funny!” Velvet takes Madison’s hand and removes it rather forcefully. At that point, Rayne tells Sky to get her head in the game because Angelina’s coming to take back what she thinks is rightfully hers. Velvet doesn’t reply; instead, she just stares at Madison and then walks away.

Part two of the match after the cut:

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Impact Write-Up (June 17th, 2010): Welcome To The Angelina Love Express. Destination: Victory Road.

I just ripped off a Sue Sylvester quote for my title this week. I’m so sorry.

I don’t know about you guys, but the lack of Knockouts on last week’s Impact left me pretty bitter and disgusted. It was the last show before their pay-per-view extravaganza, Slammiversary, and they did absolutely nothing to build up to Roxxi versus Madison Rayne for the TNA Knockouts Championship. As awful as that was, the worst was yet to come as we witnessed an absolute travesty take place at Slammiversary. Roxxi was unceremoniously fired from TNA with little, to no explanation and we had to watch her once again sacrifice herself for this company that seemingly has no respect for her sacrifices and work ethic. The way TNA has treated Roxxi is despicable, but life goes on and now I suggest that all of us fans move on as well. As we found out tonight, Angelina Love is now back in action and she already has a title shot at TNA’s next PPV, Victory Road. With that in mind, Angelina stepped into the ring against Lacey von Erich, the woman who replaced her in the Beautiful People. The match wasn’t to shabby which is a lot more than I can say for Angelina’s ugly ring gear


skip ahead to 1:40

Mid-way through the first half of Impact, the camera cuts to a backstage shot of a pair of nicely tanned legs. One of the TNA Knockouts is laying down, or laying out, and as the camera pans up the female’s body, the guys who watch are treated to a barely covered backside. On said backside sits one of the TNA Knockouts Tag Team Championship belts and upon further review, the Knockout who is getting a massage is our girl, Lacey. She’s smiling and at peace with her surroundings as the masseur goes to work on her lower back. One of the commentators (Mike Tenay if I remember right) makes a remark that Lacey has an odd way of preparing for her match tonight.

Angelina made her way to the ring later on. We didn’t really get to see the ring entrance thanks to a video package of some TNA action figures that no one is going to buy, but whatever. I’m not exactly bothered. Angelina is already talking and she mentions that because she’s been sitting on the sidelines for the past six weeks thanks to an injury, she now knows how precarious an athlete’s position in life can be. It basically put everything in perspective for her, because Angelina realizes that every match could very well end up being her last because of all the risk factors involved in wrestling; one wrong move can end everything. Angelina says she is not going to waste another second of her career. She calls out Lacey, saying that it’s them two tonight, and come next week, she’s going to get Velvet. Angelina continues on by saying that at Victory Road she will regain her Knockouts Championship against Madison. Angelina tells Lacey to get out there now and the BP’s theme music hits.

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Scrapped Knockouts Match Airs on International Impact (Full Match Report)

Diva Dirt reader, David Myles wrote in to tell us that a match scrapped from this past Thursday’s episode of Impact has aired internationally, particularly in Australia and the UK.

The match pit #1 Contender Roxxi and newcomer Rosie Lottalove against The Beautiful People’s Lacey Von Erich and Velvet Sky on the go-home show before tonight’s Slammiversary pay per view.

The Motor City Machine Guns came down on commetary, Roxxi’s music played and her and Rosie made their way to the ring in a pretty funny entrance. (Roxxi again wearing the brown outfit). The guns are horrified they have to be on commetary watching Rosie just to get on TV, but they call her ‘hot’ nonetheless. They replay the events from last week with Madison and Rosie. The opponents Velvet and Lacey enter (sans Madison Rayne), and the Guns compare entrances of Rosie and TBP. A few fat jokes and we get to the match.

Rosie starts off against Velvet, Velvet mocks Rosie by shaking her ‘thang’, to which Rosie shakes her own. Velvet charges and gets knocked down by Rosie before tagging in Lacey, who also mocks Rosie by walking in with her arms outstretched (a la trish mocking ‘fat’ lita), before shoving Rosie, who doesn’t move, Rosie shoves Lacey back and sends her into next week.

Lacey composes herself before attempting to bodyslam Rosie (yep…) even with Velvet’s encouragement she fails to lift Rosie, and Rosie easily slams Lacey before tagging in Roxxi who hits a sloppy dropkick on LVE, before Lacey tags in Velvet. Velvet charges and is dropped with a drop toe hold, she grabs Vel Vel with an arm wrench before allowing Rosie to tag herself in (after being slightly out of reach and missing the first tag attempt ~lulz) Rosie hits a standing axe-handle to Velvet before continuing to work over the arm. Roxxi (for some reason) is trying to get into the ring or around to Lacey, but anyway, manages to accidently distract the referee, allowing Velvet to pull Rosie’s hair and get her in position for LVE to hit her across the back of the leg with the infrequently seen ‘ugly stick’. Rosie sells it like she had been shot in the leg, and Lacey tags in and hits a double team ‘wish bone’ on Rosie, Lacey works over the leg before tagging Velvet back in.

Read the rest:

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Impact Write-Up (June 3rd, 2010): Making An Impact, Rosie Style!

Today’s Impact Write-Up is brought to you with a heavy heart and a rather somber approach. Last night, my precious kitty, Tygrr, succumbed to the afterlife after a very brave fight. She wasn’t but six weeks, but I was attached, and sadly she’s no longer with me. As sad as I am about her passing, it’s a relief to not have to watch her suffer any longer. This Write-Up is dedicated to my little baby and like the great Freddy Mercury once sang, “The show must go on.”

It did go on last night and in a big way, no pun intended of course. TNA saw the debut of a new Knockout; one who’s hiring was rather controversial in the first place. Rosie Lottalove made her first televised appearance against the number one contender to the Knockouts Championship, Roxxi. I’m pretty sure none of us looked at this match on paper (or computer screen) and expected an instant classic. Personally, I can’t believe someone who brutally injured another Knockout got a job but it is what it is (still my favorite saying). Rosie was the first woman to make her way to the ring and good lord. Words don’t even begin to do her outfit justice so I’m not even going to try. She’s certainly got a sparkling personality. I love the way she was announced too.

Instead of focusing on Rosie’s ring entrance, TNA showed their class by highlighting Rosie’s tryout match against Daffney. You can bet that alone is going to make my “Ugly” section because a lot of rude things are coming to mind right now. Maybe I’ll calm down before I get to the ranting part of this column. Nonetheless, the video package gives Taz the opportunity to put Rosie over by saying Daffney is now on the injured reserved list and that’s why we haven’t seen her in quite some time.

Question: Taz, why haven’t we seen ODB and Hamada in “quite some time”?

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Impact Write-Up (May 27th, 2010): Impact Fails To Impress. Water Is Wet. Turbatu Is Red Clay. C’est Le Vie.

It’s just after 4 AM and I’m feeling quite sprightly at the moment. The French Open is on my television. Rafa Nadal is playing. The entire Impact show is up on YouTube so I don’t have to leave the comfort of my livingroom desk and big screen TV in order to recap the Knockout action for each and every one of you. At the time of this introduction, I have yet to watch the match itself but it features Lacey Von Erich. That fact alone makes this an epic in the making and I know that secretly all of you are closet Lacey fans. Without Lacey, you’d have nothing to look forward too or complain about! And speaking of our girl, she her part of the show involved a tag team title defense alongside the devious Velvet Sky. The two Beautiful People were in action against Sarita and Taylor Wilde, who to my knowledge have done nothing to earn a tag title shot, but whatev. At least they’re on television for like the third week in a row so I’m not going to complain.

The Knockout portion of Impact starts with a stupid promo for Halfpint Brawlers which isn’t a surprise if you read spoilers. Something named Puppet is sitting at the commentary table with Taz and Mike Tenay. Apparently he’s the owner of the new midget show and he puts it over before we go to the backstage area. Christy is standing by with Roxxi, who last week defeated Madison Rayne in a non-title match. Roxxi is wearing her ugly brown outfit again, but Christy sports a pair of fit jeans and a white wife beater. Christy talks about Roxxi’s victory over Madison and welcomes her back to TNA with open arms. Roxxi replies that it’s great to be back and that she’s looking forward to her time in TNA. As she’s talking, the video of her injury is being played. I’m totally shutting my eyes because it’s just far to gross to watch again. Roxxi says that the position she’s in now is a familiar one but this time, she’s not going to let her chances slip through her fingers. Roxxi’s pretty pumped and ready to go, and Christy decides to drop a bomb. She mentions to Roxxi that because of her (Roxxi’s) victory last week, Roxxi will be Madison at Slammiversary for the TNA Knockouts Championship. Roxxi gets all excited over the opportunity and basically freaks out. Christy is super giddy herself and Roxxi finally takes the microphone and tells Madison that she will meet her at Slammiversary.

Christy sends it back to the ring area where Sarita and Taylor are waiting for the Beautiful People. Puppet is invited to stick around for commentary (oh joy) and the BPs begin to make their way to the ring. I refuse to talk about their entrance ever again so to take up this writing space I want to say that Rafael Nadal is wearing my favorite color combination at this year’s French Open – lime green and turquoise. True story. Instead of discussing the in-ring action, the announcers and the midget begin to talk about Halfpint Brawlers. Shocking. Velvet and Sarita are looking to kick things off and Sarita catches Velvet around the waist. Velvet reverses whatever Sarita was planning and hiptosses her to the mat. Velvet’s super proud of herself but Sarita’s not down for long. She Shawn Michaels’ up to her feet and when Velvet turns around she shrieks and goes back at Sarita. Sarita brings her down and goes for a quick roll-up, but she only gets a two count. Velvet’s back up in a flash but is brought down with an elbow. Sarita makes the tag to Taylor, then splashes Velvet just to do it. Taylor mounts her first bit of offense by somersaulting on top of Velvet and she goes for the cover. Another two count.

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Impact Write-Up (May 20th, 2010): Welcome Back, Roxxi! And May I Add, You’re Looking Fab!

This past Sunday at Sacrifice we sadly watched as Tara’s TNA career came to an end at the hands of TNA Knockouts Champion, Madison Rayne. The young champion finally earned her stripes and hopefully a little respect within the wrestling community with her big win over Tara. This week, on the heels of her biggest TNA victory, Madison competes against TNA familiar face, Roxxi, in a non-title match up. How did they both fare? Well stop wondering and keep reading! Like duh!

Roxxi is out to the ring first and to be honest, I probably wouldn’t have recognized her if I hadn’t read the spoilers. She looks pretty good. Her hair has grown into a cute bob and the highlight job… superb. She’s got a great hairstylist, let me tell you. The only thing about her appearance that bothers me? The weird brown outfit. Not a fan really. TNA explains her mysterious, five-month absence by taking us back to New Year’s Knockouts Eve and the match featuring Roxxi and Hamada. Like a moron, I pause the video to type this little section up and I pause it on the grotesque angle that shows Roxxi foot being broken. It’s a horrible angle and I’ll probably have nightmares when I go to sleep.

But hey, all you Hamada fans should be happy. She got mentioned and we got a three second video!

Yes, I’m cruel tonight. Not sure why I feel so damn feisty. Anyway, I’m getting sidetracked. Roxxi stands in the ring and homegirl looks stacked and fit. I’m loving her appearance and now it’s time for the champion to come to the ring. Madison is alone and that suits me just fine. I really didn’t want to write about the lesbian entrance of the BP for the 3490749327402th time. Madison looks pretty adorable herself and I just appreciate the way she’s carrying herself now. Since winning that title, Madison has started to carry herself with this very appealing little swagger. It suits her, as does championship gold.

Mike Tenay reminds us that Roxxi has had issues with the BP for ages as the bell rings and the match gets underway. The more powerful of the two women, Roxxi, takes control right off the bat. She rolls Madison into several pinning combinations before beginning to work over Madison’s arm and shoulder. Eventually the champ is thrown into one of the corners, flattened against it thanks to a splash, and once she comes tumbling out of it, Roxxi bounces off the ropes and flies at her with a knee. Madison luckily dodges this and Roxxi gets hung up on the ropes. Madison clubs her taller opponent in the back a few times before grabbing her by the hair and slamming her down to the mat. Roxxi’s head bounces off the ground and she’s in obvious pain now. Welcome back, right?

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TNA Impact Spoilers: May 20th, 2010

Spoilers for Thursday’s episode of Impact below. Click the ‘show’ link to see:

Spoiler
* Roxxi vs. Madison Rayne. Winner via cradle DDT stunner type move, Roxxi.

* They advertised Half Pint Brawlers coming to Spike on June 2nd. One of the stars, Puppet joins the commentary team.

* Announced as for Impact, for the TNA Knockouts Titles, Sarita and Taylor Wilde vs. The Beautiful People. Winner via a claw slam from Lacey onto Taylor, The Beautiful People. Puppet celebrates in the ring with them afterwards and smacks Velvet’s butt so they beat Puppet up. Lacey feels bad about it and checks on Puppet. When she does he kisses her. She breaks free and goes in for more and makes out with him again. (Source: Wrestling News World)

Melanie’s thoughts ater the cut:

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